I was sure I was on Candid Camera today.

Ok, just a little background to preface this blog....When I first moved to Vegas (2.5 years ago) I went to the license branch like a good boy to get my Nevada Driver's License. I was told that since I had too many speeding tickets in Indiana I would not only have to to take the written test, but also take the skills driving test. I passed the written test and then they told me I could make an appointment a month and a half from now or wait in line for approximately 4 hours to take the skills test and even then they couldn't promise me I would get to take the test today. I chose to make an appointment and of course forgot about it when it came time to go. Fast forward about 1 year....I decided I would finally go back to try again. Since it had been so long since I had taken the written test I had to take it again. I rushed through the test and somehow failed the written test and I felt like the biggest failure at life ever after I looked around and saw a room full of white trash people that could barely speak English passing the same test I just failed. Fast forward another year....I lost my Indiana Driver's License (still valid) while I was home last so I decided I had better go try again for my license. This time I aced the written test and I had to make another appointment for the skills test a month and a half in advance. It was still a long shot that I would actually remember my appointment at that point, but I set a couple different reminders on my phone and I managed to make it to my appointment about 15 minutes early.

I gave them my paperwork and checked in for my appointment and they told me to have a seat until they called my name. I already imagined them taking forever to get to me despite me having a scheduled appointment. Surprisingly, they called my name at 11:00 am sharp. I went up to the lady that called my name and she asked me if I was Patrick, I responded "Yes, ma'am". She asked me if I had ever had a license before, I responded "Yes, ma'am". She said "thank God, I will just take you on the short route then". So far, so good.

We got outside and she checked my turn signals, brake lights, and horn. Then she got in the car and sat there for a moment. I thought about asking her where we were headed, but realized my only option was to pull forward out of my parking space so I put it in gear and she stopped me. She said "Aren't you going to wait for me to get my seat belt on?" I said "I apologize" and I waited for her to put her seat belt on before I pulled forward. She said "No, put it back in park and wait for me to get my seat belt on". I obliged and she put her belt on and then said "Did you know that can result in an automatic failure?" I said "No, I did not realize that not waiting for my passenger to put their seat belt on before I put it in gear could result in an automatic failure, I apologize." She then tells me to turn my radio off (it was barely even audible I had it turned on so low). Ridiculous, but whatever...I turned my radio off.

She tells me where to go and I follow directions all while driving with my hands in the "Ten and Two" position. We get to the first stop light, which was less than two blocks away, and I come to a complete stop before taking one hand off of the wheel and rest it on my lap. While we are waiting at the stop light I say to her "Just out of curiosity, is it a penalty if I don't drive with my hands at the "Ten and Two" positions?" She says that it is so I make it a point to always drive with my hands in the correct position. I did take one hand off the wheel on 4-5 occasions throughout the rest of the test....probably 3 times to rest it on my lap again while we were stopped at lights and maybe 2 times to itch my face. I know she is going to be a stickler so I make sure to pay attention to the speed limit and stay comfortably under it so she won't have anything to complain about. I signaled everywhere I should and always checked my blind spot. During the parallel parking portion of the test I pulled forward even with the first barrel, backed in and just as I got close to the curb I pulled forward approximately 2 feet and then backed in the rest of the way. I then pulled forward to get the car straight (or parallel) in the parking spot. At this point I was probably 3 feet from the front barrels and 15 feet from the back barrels so I backed up a few feet so I would be in the center of the parking spot. Flawless performance, in my opinion.

At one point during the test I asked her what her success rate was for people passing the skills test and she told me it depends on the person. I correctly told her that it didn't really depend on the person, she still has to have an overall success rate for all of her drivers combined. She told me then that is was "pretty good".

Now is when I felt like the candid camera session began. I parked my car and we went inside to "discuss my test". She had another co-worker come in and observe out discussion. She asked me how long I had lived in Vegas and I told her "about two years." She said, "So you should be familiar with the roads around here then, correct?" I said "Yes, ma'am". Then she listed some errors that I had made during my driving test.

1. At several times during the drive I was driving 35 MPH when the speed limit was 45 MPH and during some other times I was driving 30 MPH when the speed limit was 40 MPH

2. Often times, I turned my turn signal on too early when making turns.

3. I have a tendency to driving with one hand on the wheel.

4. I didn't allow her to get her seat belt on before I began to drive.

5. There were too many maneuvers in my parallel parking.

She then stated that these were all very vital things. Each time she read off another of my "violations" I could not help myself from smirking at first and full blown smiling by the end of our "discussion". She then told me that I had failed my test and I would need to reschedule an appointment.

I obviously know I will never get anywhere by arguing with her so I was polite and just said OK, and got my paper work back from her and went on my way to reschedule another appointment. Guess what? The next available appointment is on December 10th.

I have no idea why she had it out for me, but she clearly did not want me to pass. I honestly thought it was a joke until the very end when I got up to leave the discussion room....it wasn't a joke.

PGA Tourney in Vegas this week...

I'm caddying for Jeff again this year in the Vegas tourney. If you are in Vegas and want to go I can get you tickets. If you know me well enough to already have my phone number send me a text and we'll figure out how to get you some tickets. You can also send me or Macon Marc a PM and let one of us know you want tickets and I'll leave em for ya in will call or give them to Marc to meet up with you to get them.

NWP live rail 1x

Lasik....

I have worn contacts since I was in the 6th or 7th grade and I have been planning on getting lasik for a long time now. The only thing that has kept me from getting it is me being lazy. Everyone I talk to says it is the best money they have ever spent and I'll be so happy once I get it done. I am sure they are right, but I have just never gotten around to it.

My questions for you are these:

1. Everyone always says to make sure to get a good doctor to do your surgery...How in the world to I find out which ones are good?
2. How much of a hassle is it to go through the visiting/consulting with the doctor before you schedule it? How long will it be in between?
3. How much is it going to cost?
4. What is wrong with super cheap places like this one? http://www.lasikvisioninstitute.com/
-I realize these are my eyes we are messing with here and I only get one pair of them for my whole life. However, is a doctor that I pay $4,000 to do my surgery going to do any better of a job than the doctor I pay $600?
-Which people are the suckers...the ones that go to the cheapo doctors to get their surgery done or the ones that overpay for the same thing because it makes them feel like they are getting better service due to the higher price?
- I don't wanna be the idiot that pays $4 for a Fiji bottle of water at the Bellagio when then are giving out free Bellagio brand bottled water....I KNOW which people are the suckers there.

Cliff Notes: Does anyone have any proof that the more expensive eye doctors are better than the people offering it for $300/eye?

Should I be a tattle tail?

Ok, obviously NWP is the place I turn to when I have moral dilemmas so here goes:

My roommate and I were on our way to the Bellagio to play some poker last night and he needed to stop at the gas station to get some gas. This gas station has these kiosks where you can pay with a credit card, cash, or use as an ATM. The kiosk is shared by more than one pump (not sure it was for all 4 pumps or just ours and the one behind ours. My roommate looked on the pump for the credit card thing and didn't notice the kiosk thing so he went inside to pay. While he was inside a girl using the pump behind ours put $20 in cash in to pay for her gas, but as she was putting it in a guy approached her. My roommate had left the door cracked so I could hear everything they were saying. He said "Hey, how much do you plan on putting in your tank?" She said "$20, why?" He told her that if she would just give him the $20 in cash instead he would use his credit card to put $40 in her tank. She asked him why he was going to do that and he replied "....(shrug)...because I am a nice guy?" She said that it was too late, because she had already put the $20 in the machine and he told her to just go inside and tell them she wanted it back. She seemed very confused about why any stranger would want to do this, but she went inside and got the $20 and gave it to the guy. He swiped his card and started pumping the gas for her.

I knew exactly what was going on. He obviously had a stolen credit card and he was just stealing from some innocent person in exchange for her $20. I don't know why it bothered me so much, but for some reason this guy really rubbed me the wrong way and I couldn't believe that she was dumb enough to let him get away with running this stupid scam. It took her a while to retrieve he change from inside and my roommate was done pumping gas before he was done pumping hers. I had my roommate go park the car while I watched him finish pumping her gas and so I could think about if there was anything I could or would do about it. I didn't know if she could get into any trouble for this, but I felt like she should know what just happened in case cameras had pictures of her license plates using a stolen card or something. Anyway, when he finished pumping and had walked away I got out of the car and went to talk to her.

She rolled down her window and I asked her if he had done what I thought he had. Of course she said yes and I told her that I was pretty sure he just used a stolen credit card in exchange for her $. She was in a panic then about what she should do about it. I told her there probably wasn't much she could do about it now, but I at least wanted her to know what happened in case she had to answer questions about it in the future. She told me that the card he used looked like the same kind of company card that her sister had to use just for gas purchases (I didn't realize these existed, but I suppose they do). Then it dawned on me that he wasn't stealing from a stranger, but it was more likely that he was stealing from his employer. I then remembered that the collared shirt he was wearing had a big Subaru logo on it. Oh yeah...he didn't stop at $40, he went ahead and filled it up which totaled $55.

So here is my dilemma....I know where this jerk works and I am pretty sure he was using his company credit card to steal from his employer. I am not one to be a tattle tail, but I don't like it when I see people taking advantage of other people. I know if I owned the Subaru company that this guy works for I would LOVE it if someone called in to tell me that one of my employees was stealing from me. So the golden rule is do to others as you would want them to do to you. Obviously, the thief wouldn't want me to report him and I wouldn't want him to report me doing something wrong, but then again I would never do something so stupid. However, his employer would probably love for me to tell them about this and I would want them to do the same to me.

Should I be a huge jerk/tattle tail and call this guy's work to tell them what I saw or should I just keep it to myself?

Bobby Murcer DD

Bobby Murcer =

I believe two people had him on their lists.

http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20080712/ap_on_...HVpQR_fmykE1vAI