My debts, apoligies, and some words of wisdom

First and formost I would like to publicly apologize to all the people that I still owe some money too. I know I have fucked up, and may have mislead at times about my financial situation, and I offer no excuse for it.

I just contacted O about that 10k and will be giving him cash next time I see him...I have finally been doing really well again and have almost paid back every single one of my loans/stakes. I struggled for a long time and I have high expenses and I know I fucked up there just is no good excuse for any of this drama, however I am not the type of person to not honor my debts. I will pay every single one of them back.

I have come a long way on paying people back, and I have learned a very good lesson about loaning and borrowing money in this business. I have endured a ton of trash talking over the last year or so about me not paying debts. I put myself in a very bad situation and the only person to blame is myself. I have made many mistakes along the way, and I have learned a life long lesson from it. Nobody wants to be in this type of stressful situation. Being harassed and pressured because I owed many different people anywhere from 10k-50k. When your main income is mostly dependent on poker it is probably one of the worst feelings that you can endure mentally. It has been overwelming at times which makes concentrating on playing your best game even more difficult. Many top pros have debts and loans that they have accumulated over the years, I myself am owed over 6 figures in loans, most of it that I will probably never see and I know that is irrelevant but I am just pointing out the nature of this business and that there are many people in this business who really have no intentions or just have no ability to pay their debts. I am not one of those people and my actions will prove it. I know their have been a lot of doubters and people questioning my morals, but those are based on your own assumptions on what you have heard from other people or read about me. I know anyone who knows me personally would vouch that those statements are untrue.

Back when I was doing well and had a lot of money I was one of the most generous people in this business when it came to loaning money to my friends and other young up and coming players who I thought would be successful. I was very fortunate to be so successful at such a young age. I made a ton of money at the age of 25, and I was young and thought I was invincible. The older more wiser people in my life knew better, and offered me great advice to which I never listened to. In one ear and out the other. Nobody can beat me, im the best. Texaslimitking cant beat me in the long run, and I emptied my entire poker liquid bankroll playing 1k-2k hu on ftp on that notion. Yes that was my downfall. I could not fathom at the time someone as good or better than me and I was willing to bet it all. Yep I was an idiot. I could have done a lot of things differently but I didnt. The past is the past, and I am not gonna dwell on it. I am focused on my future, and I am back in the zone. I do not have to be the best in the world anymore. And you dont have to be the best in the world to make money in this business. I know what I need to do now.

If you have read my about me on myspace, I stated I was a master of mind on mind combat which means I had a natural talent in reading my opponents mind, and I was able to adjust my game accordingly because I knew all their tendencies, betting patterns, ect. But I never mastered my own mind. My emotions, my ego, was my own doom. I stated the true successful poker players have mastered the both; mind/mind combat and their own mind. I finally understand my own mind now. I know what it takes to be successful at both. I bring this up again, because that is good news. I am in a different place in my life and I can see things in a new light. My younger years are over, as I am approaching 30. Now back to the point.....

I have been paying everyone money this whole time when I have extra to show good faith, and now there are only a few people left. I do not appreciate people talking shit about me and my personal finances and making it public. This is my private business, and I have spoken with every single person about my situation and they have all received at least some payment from me when I can afford to do so. There may be a one or two exceptions but I can assure those too will be paid in full or will receive some payment in the near future. Managing a poker bankroll, pay bills, and pay outstanding loans= unnecessary stress, and I obviously have many regrets about putting myself in this situation.

I have made a lot of good changes in my life and my discipline and bankroll management is at its peak right now...the key will be maintaining it that way. Again to all those people that I still owe which is down to 7 people now, I have every intention to honor what I owe I will leave your names anonymous as you can feel free to contact me anytime via phone. Since I am somewhat of a public figure in the poker world for various reasons, when I have paid off everyone in full I will again make a public statement, at which point if there is someone who feels I still have an outstanding debt with you will be free to publicize it. Right now I am very close to having everyone paid back, and it shouldn't be too much longer before I can finally put this drama to rest and move on to more positive things in my poker career.

Last but not least I would like to sum this all up with something my dad told me about 3 years ago. My dad predicted this exact phenomenon in the poker world. He said be careful with loaning and borrowing money, he witnessed an almost identical situation in the early 80's with commodity trading, where all of a sudden there was a huge influx of money and a lot of young guys were getting rich. And when you are young and making millions so fast you think it will never end. But just like in the commodity business it does come to an end at some point. People go broke, make bad decisions, borrow money, and like everyone has said before there is no upside to loaning money free of interest. In poker just like the commodity business only the very very best succeed in the end. So you young kids out there making millions, be smart with your money, make wise investments, do not loan money, and maybe at the very least I can help some of the younger people who are reading this who have been successful to not make the same mistakes I have. Unfortunately its human nature that most people have to learn from their own mistakes, regardless of how much good advice other people can give you.

neverwin

25 pages, 12 nooses, 19 dog pics, 2 micon posts, 6 photoshops, 3 dupes.

Did anyone read more than the first paragraph?

did anyone read past the first word?

I read this far "First and formost. . ."

(Also, it's foremost.)

sweet blog

I read to the third.

(we simulposted)

Not yet, but he def didn't write it.

im just glad i could get the first noose in

im in atlantis right now, and i promise you I wrote every word, it took my over 2 hours while i watched the gb seattle game, and I edited it like 3 times, and I can write decently when I want to take the time to do it

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neverwin you piece of rat shit just pay the fucking money back and quit feeding us bullshit sob stories

Actually I read the whole thing and I enjoyed it, keep up the good work neverwin. Also, don't bet anymore sports although you killed me in last years Championship games.

I glanced over it just now, and starting sentences with "but" and "and" like you are fucking Jamal in Finding Forrester is not writing decently.

(That is just one of many things.)