The Vegas Happy Ending Thread

We have the highest concentration of Asian Massage Parlors in this country here in Vegas. Most are right off of Spring Mountain Road and the rest are spread around town, but without the proper knowledge of how to conduct yourself and what to look for in one of these places your experience can be very unsatisfactory at times.

It's funny, Asian Massage Parlors are a lot like Chinese food. You always get very excited about the whole idea, but most of the time you end up unsatisfied and hungry again after 20 minutes. Once in a while you get an experience that is very memorable, but the majority of the time you leave feeling like you were somewhat ripped off for a few different reasons.

The majority of complaints are:

1. Girl wasn't very pretty. This is easily dealt with. Very simple, don't be afraid to speak your mind. If your girl doesn't meet your requirements, request another girl. If they don't comply just leave. Plenty of places in Vegas.

2. Massage wasn't long enough. This is a tough one because a lot of times there is a major communication gap, and the girl will act like she doesn't understand when you tell her to make sure you get the full hour. Keep in mind that your whack off time is included in the hour, so a massage will only ever last 30-45 minutes, the rest of the time is for sex shenanigans.

3. Was a shitty massage. To me this is the tough one, cause I actually will go to these places hoping for a good massage. Keep in mind these girls are not trained specialists. They are basically poor Asian girls that are stuck whacking you off just to make ends meet most of the time. When you actually get a good massage it is a major bonus IMO.


So, moving on..... As far as prices go, it is usually $70-80 for the hour, plus a tip. The $70 will usually include a table shower and massage. Some places will charge extra for the table shower. Here in Vegas the average tip for being whacked off is $60, blowjob $100+, and some will offer the pussy which will run $160+, obv depending on the girl.

If you get the table shower make sure she lays down a fresh piece of plastic over the bed. Unless the place is high class, it's usually a good idea to shower before you go and skip the table shower. They are usually going to not put fresh plastic down in the low class joints (which most are) and will scrub you down with a cloth or sponge that was used on infinite horny dudes before you. There are places that have disposable wash cloths, but unfortunately you won't know if that's what they use until you actually get into the shower room, unless you are somehow able to ask before hand. Again, always hard with the communication gap. The places close to the strip usually don't offer this anyway, so a lot of times this won't even be an issue.

Also, there are some places that offer a wet massage, which is when the girl gets nude and massages you all over with her oiled up body. Again, a bit skeezy seeing there were dudes doing the same before you. If you do happen to find a nice clean place with a very attractive girl this is highly recommended. I have yet to find one here in Vegas, but I'm sure they are out there.

Moving on to the massage. When you get into the massage room make sure to take all of your clothes off, DO NOT LEAVE YOUR UNDERWEAR ON. This lets the girl know you know what you're doing there, and that her hand needs to be on your package at some point. While you are getting the massage face down she will rub your balls to make sure you are cool with it.

After she has rubbed you all over face down she will ask you to turn over. She will then rub your chest a little and ask you in her broken English if you want to be whacked off. Of course you nod your head yes. If you want a BJ just point to your mouth at this point. This is the universal massage room sign for "I want a blowjob." She most likely will ask how much you tip, which as stated before should be around $100. It's all downhill from there my friends. Once she is done she will wipe you down with a hot towel, and then you sit up and get dressed while she gets you a cup of water. Leave the tip on the table and be on your way ready for a great night of partying with a nut already busted.

That is absolutely the greatest post i've ever read.

Which makes me wonder ...

Very good blog about a first time trip to a whack shack....

http://www.neverwinpoker.com/forums/conten...rt/#entry860941

reading this thread makes me want to go get a RUB N TUG.

I'm never going to actually utilize the knowledge presented here, but trust me, if I was, I know this was a very informative and comprehensive post.

And don't you fraudalert me, I'm serious!

Soccertease should fraudalert you.

If anyone is interested there is a decent on at 8480 South Las Vegas Blvd

smells like a

post

do you know thegunslinger?

obv


How was the shower? best part IMO

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Har har.

Better late than never.